Few of us doubt that evil exists…

…the question is where.

I recently had my world rocked when I read Philip Zimbardo’s book, The Lucifer Effect: Understanding How Good People Turn Evil.  Not so much by the fact that each of us has a propensity for evil behavior – who among us hasn’t made a biting comment when we’ve felt hurt or threatened?

What did surprise me was Zimbardo’s insight as to how the situations we face trigger evil behavior and how quickly that can occur.  Professor Zimbardo, a social psychologist, created the Stanford Prison Experiment at Stanford University in the 1970s.  His goal was to determine whether or not situations influenced behavior and, if so, to what extent.  His findings are amazing.

Within a few days male college students who had agreed to be either guard or prisoner depending on the luck of the draw experienced the following:

• Guards became progressively more verbally and psychologically abusive (physical abuse was not permitted) – so much so that the experiment was stopped after just five days.
• Those guards who didn’t participate in the abuse, or did so only sporadically to avoid criticism themselves, didn’t do anything to curb the abusive guards’ behavior.
• Some prisoners experienced such severe depression that they were released after only a day or two in the experiment.  Interestingly they could have left voluntarily at any time, but didn’t.
• All prisoners became accepting of the ill treatment they received.
• Professor Zimbardo admits that he fell victim to the situation and moved away from what he perceived his true nature.

What’s the message for us?  As we’re thinking about how we structure our organizations, incentive programs and other aspects of our business, let’s keep in mind this propensity for evil.  Are we creating an environment in which we encourage arrogance toward customers, intolerance with employees or exceedingly unrealistic expectation for vendors.

If you’re thinking “I’d never do that.”  Take a look at some of your policies.  Have you set sales quotas and, in doing so, encouraged your salespeople to sell to customers who don’t really value what you offer.  Worse yet, are they lowering the price to get the sale which hurts both your company and the customer.

Have you established aggressive collection policies?  If so, have your collectors lost their compassion for people who are trying to pay you, but find themselves struggling to find a way to do so.

Have you created compensation programs that encourage your employees to ignore what’s in the best interests of your customers or your business.  Years ago, during a training program I was presenting to mid-level managers, they told me of an ongoing problem.  When I began to offer suggestions on how to deal with the problem, they said “Oh, we know how to fix it.  That’s not how we’re compensated.”  Ouch!

It’s counter-intuitive, but the policies we establish and the procedures we put into place have the propensity to trigger the evil that exists in all of us by virtue of our human nature.  Spend a few extra minutes evaluating your policies and procedures with an eye to the evil it could create and you’ll save yourselves and those with whom you interact a great deal of pain.

The 7 Steps to Becoming INVALUABLE program is designed to help you see more effective ways of doing business – ways that dramatically improve your bottom line while making your life easier.  In today’s blog I used Step 6, Eclectic Education, to gain new perspectives from a social psychologist.  I also used Step 4, See Similarities, to demonstrate how his concepts apply our policy-making, procedure-writing activities.  Finally, I used Step 6, Contrarian Mindset, to offer ways to avoid triggering the less savory aspects of our human nature.  For more information on the 7 Steps to Becoming INVALUABLE visit www.furtwengler.com/7steps.htm.

If you’d like to receive a weekly email reminder with a link to The Invaluable Leader blog or if you’d like me to address specific topics, please send me an email at dale@furtwengler.com. Please share your experience with our readers by posting a comment.

For insights into how you can apply counter-intuitive thinking to your pricing strategy, visit my Pricing for Profit blog at www.pricingforprofitbook.com.

My latest book, Pricing for Profit, was released 9.9.09 in the United States, Canada, U.K., Italy, France, Germany and the Netherlands.  It’s available in all the major bookstores – Borders, Barnes and Noble and Amazon.

Each of us experiences fear.

The question is “How do we conquer it?”

Recently I wrote about fear and the use of a contrarian mindset as a way to prevent personal fears from becoming societal fears and eventually triggering violent acts. In order to be able to become the voice of reason, we must be able to conquer our own fears. Easier said than done?

Chapter 23 of the Chandogya Upanisad says “Where one does not see another, does not hear another, does not know another, that is abundance. Where one sees another, hears another, knows another, that is smallness. Abundance is immortal: smallness is mortal.”

What does this quote have to do with fear and our need to conquer it? Fear is egocentric. Whether I’m afraid of losing power, influence, customers, a valued employee or vendor, the love of my life, a child or financial stability, I’m focused on my needs. That bespeaks smallness on my part. All that I’m concerned with are my needs, my wants, my desires. With that mindset, virtually anyone I see, hear or know poses a threat. I’m going to examine everyone – even those I love – to discern whether they’re a potential rival for what I desire or what I fear I might lose.

Let’s contrast that mindset with the earlier portion of the upanisad – “Where one does not see another, does not hear another, does not know another, that is abundance.” When I’m free from fear what I see are possibilities, not just for myself but for others as well. There is no me versus them; no zero sum game where one person must lose for the other to win. There is plenty of power, influence, love and financial wealth for all to enjoy. I don’t create opportunities just for me; I just create opportunities. I understand that the more opportunities I create the better off we’ll all be.

When I create abundance for others, abundance is assured for me as well. That’s one of the messages of this upanisad!

It’s natural for us, as human beings, to experience scarcity, fear and smallness from time to time. I wish that I could tell you that I’m exempt, but I suffer the same human frailties everyone does. I have, however, found ways to overcome these natural tendencies.

It’s counter-intuitive, but we can train our minds to quickly recognize when we’re feeling scarcity, fear and smallness. With that realization comes a choice, “Do I continue to focus on myself and perpetuate the fear I’m feeling? Or do I choose to begin exploring possibilities for a new, bright future for all of us?” The choice becomes easier over time.

It won’t take long for you to get a sense for how much fun it is to be able to create possibilities at will. Soon your mind will quickly make the shift from the smallness of fear to the largesse of abundance. That’s when you’ll know you’ve conquered fear; that’s when you life will seem fuller and richer even in challenging times. This is my wish for you – a sense of abundance drawn from the abyss of scarcity. Enjoy your freedom from fear!

The 7 Steps to Becoming INVALUABLE program is designed to help you see more effective ways of doing business – ways that dramatically improve your bottom line while making your life easier. In today’s blog I used Step 6, Eclectic Education, to gain new perspectives from the upanisads, spiritual teachings pre-dating most organized religions, regarding the difference between the immortal and mortal aspects of our nature. I also used Step 4, See Similarities, to apply these concepts to the fear each of us experiences by virtue of our humanity. Finally, I hinted at Step 3, Suspend Judgment, when I spoke of “challenging times.” After all, times are challenging only if we decide to judge them to be so. For more information on the 7 Steps to Becoming INVALUABLE visit www.furtwengler.com/7steps.htm.

If you’d like to receive a weekly email reminder with a link to The Invaluable Leader blog or if you’d like me to address specific topics, please send me an email at dale@furtwengler.com. Please share your experience with our readers by posting a comment.

For ideas on how to apply counter-intuitive thinking to your company’s pricing strategy, visit my new Pricing for Profit blog at www.pricingforprofitbook.com/. Enjoy!

Good news – My latest book, Pricing for Profit, was released 9.9.09 in the United States, Canada, U.K., Italy, France, Germany and the Netherlands.  It’s available in all the major bookstores – Borders.com, BarnesandNoble.com and Amazon.com.

Happy Thanksgiving!

If we merely survive this economy…

…we’ve wasted an opportunity to grow.

The Dalai Lama says that we ought to be most grateful to those who cause us the most trouble because they afford us the greatest opportunity to learn.  The same can be said for challenging times.

There is little doubt that these are uncertain and confusing times.  The question is what lessons can we take from these times to better position ourselves for the future.  Here’s what I’ve learned.

Resilience
We’ve lived through tough times before and come out stronger for the experience.  We will again.  I’ve lived through the recession in 1974 when interest rates were an alarming 12%.  Only to find them pale in comparison to the 21% rates in 1983.

By the way, I was in the mortgage banking industry during both periods.  People in that industry have asked that I not return.  Sorry folks, but whether I re-enter that market again or not, we’ll see much higher rates in about three years.

The lesson is that regardless of the depth of the problems we’ve faced in any economy, we’ve always recovered.  We’re human beings, we’re resilient.

You’re in the marketing business
Success in business has less to do with what industry you’re in, what offerings you have or what business model you use, than it does with your ability to market your offerings effectively.  If you doubt that, recall the tremendous success Microsoft has experienced because they were more effective than Apple in marketing in the early years.  Once buyers become accustomed to a vendor it’s difficult for them to change even when they’re experiencing problems.  Again, that’s human nature at work.

If you want to enjoy greater business success in the future, use this economy to gain greater clarity about who your ideal customer is and how to tailor your marketing message to attract them.

Value is more important than price
Many business people think that buyers become more price conscious during a down economy.  The reality is that they become more value conscious.  It becomes more important to the buyer that every dollar spent provides optimum value.  Let’s say that you’ve historically bought name brand canned vegetables.  In a difficult economy you may try a store brand, but if it doesn’t taste as good as the name brand, you’re not going to change.  If there isn’t a noticeable difference, you’ll switch to the store brand.  Either way it’s a value decision.

It’s counter-intuitive, but focusing on what we can learn from a down economy instead of survival will allow us to enjoy success in any environment.  Some of you may be thinking “That’s not counter-intuitive!”

If you’re right, then why are so many people operating from fear?  Why are business people focusing on pricing instead of marketing?  Why do business people lower their prices in attempts to salvage market share when that strategy has failed in every economy in the history of commerce?  Why do job seekers use the same techniques that everyone else is using?

This discussion of a down economy reminds me of an old baseball adage.  An umpire is asked “How do you know whether a pitch is a ball or strike?”  His response was “It ain’t nothin’ til I call it.”  This is a down economy only if we choose to call it that.  Our mindset is going to determine how challenging these times are and what we gain from them.

The 7 Steps to Becoming INVALUABLE program is designed to help you see more effective ways of doing business – ways that dramatically improve your bottom line while making your life easier.  In today’s blog I used Step 6, Eclectic Education, to gain insights from the Dalai Lama.  Step 4, See Similarities, to demonstrate that the concept applies to situations as well as people.  I also used Step 5, Contrarian Mindset, to demonstrate that the approaches businesses use in down economy are counter-productive.  For more information on the 7 Steps to Becoming INVALUABLE visit www.furtwengler.com/7steps.htm.

If you’d like to receive a weekly email reminder with a link to The Invaluable Leader blog or if you’d like me to address specific topics, please send me an email at dale@furtwengler.com.  Please share your experience with our readers by posting a comment.

Borders bookstore is hosting a book signing for my latest book, Pricing for Profit, on November 10, 2009 at 5:30 p.m.  There will be a brief 10-minute presentation on Common Pricing Errors…and tips for avoiding them followed by a Q&A session.

On November 17, 2009, the Cottleville-Weldon Springs Chamber of Commerce has graciously invited me to present an expanded version of Common Pricing Errors at their breakfast meeting at 7:30 a.m. http://www.cottlevilleweldonspringchamber.com/

Coming soon! I’m starting a new blog, Pricing for Profit, which is dedicated to helping you get compensated well for the tremendous value you provide.  Stay tuned for more information on the Pricing for Profit blog.

Finding it yields great power…

…but you have to know how to look for it.

Recently I had the good fortune to present a program for the American Society for Training and Development entitled “Have Trainers Lost Their Way?”  In this program I asked the audience to share their thoughts on what the real purpose of training is.  They offered about a dozen suggestions.

Then I asked them to find a common thread that ran through all of these suggestions.  They found this task considerably more challenging.  Finally, I shared with them what I believed to be the real purpose of training – to build confidence so that the participants felt comfortable employing what they learned.  What was the result?

When we compared the common thread I offered – building confidence – to all of the purposes they had identified, they agreed that building confidence would achieve all of the other purposes as well.

Being able to see the common thread that runs through all things – even those that don’t seem similar, is a powerful tool for you to add to your repertoire.  Josh Waitzkin, World Chess Champion, in his book, The Art of Learning, described it this way “I often sensed a logical thread to positions that seemed irrational – playing exciting chess felt like discovering hidden harmonies.”

It’s counter-intuitive, but “harmonies” do exist in much greater abundance than we realize.  Why don’t we see them?  Because our natural tendency is to see differences, not similarities.  One of the things you’ll discover is that when you train your mind to see the common thread, life gets easier.

Imagine how much easier it is to design training programs when you know that your goal is to help participants build confidence.  In essence all that you, as a trainer, need to do is provide two or three new concepts and develop exercises that allow the participants gain experience in applying those concepts.

How do you develop the ability to find the common thread that runs through whatever you’re facing?

• Broaden your knowledge base by exploring topics outside your normal interests.
• Before you begin your exploration, ask yourself “What am I going to discover that is like situations I’ve already faced in my job, at home, during play time?”
• Enjoy the exploration.  Let your subconscious mind do the work for you; that’s what it is designed to do.

Learn to see the common thread that runs through everything and you’ll not only enjoy a simpler life, you’ll amaze your friends as well.

The 7 Steps to Becoming INVALUABLE program I offer is designed to help you see more effective ways of doing business – ways that dramatically improve your bottom line while making your life easier.  In today’s blog I used Step 6, Eclectic Education, to open the door to a seemingly diverse knowledge base and Step 4, Seeing Similarities, to help you see the common thread that runs through that diverse information. For more information on the 7 Steps to Becoming INVALUABLE visit www.furtwengler.com/7steps.htm.

If you’d like to receive a weekly email reminder with a link to The Invaluable Leader blog or if you’d like me to address specific topics, please send me an email at dale@furtwengler.com.  Please share your experience with our readers by posting a comment.

Good news – My latest book, Pricing for Profit, was released 9.9.09 in the United States, Canada, U.K., Italy, France, Germany and the Netherlands.  It’s available in all the major bookstores – Borders, Barnes and Noble and Amazon.

While alluring…

…it’s regular use invites the demise of your career.

I’m sure that each of us has, at one time or another, bemoaned the fact that we didn’t have the power to change something.  If only we had the power to…, we could solve this problem quickly.

The reality is that those who have the power and use it regularly often limit their career advancement.  Why?  There are several reasons.  Most employees:

• Hate being told what to do
• Resent not having their ideas heard and acted upon
• Despise the arrogance their leader exhibits
• Will do “exactly” what the boss requests even though they know it will fail
• May harbor desires that the boss’ idea fails or, worse yet, work toward that end

Yet, despite all of these negative consequences some people achieve lofty positions using positional power.  I’m sure each of you could point to autocratic leaders who have enjoyed great success.  Or have they?  What price did they pay for that success?

Imagine the pressure autocratic leaders must feel as they:

• Manage the most minute details of their direct reports‘ work
• Assume the risk for every decision that gets made
• Work diligently to see that blame for an errant decision doesn’t land on their doorstep
• Are constantly on the alert for potential sabotage
• Work countless hours because they don’t trust their employees

Is that the career you desire?

So what’s the alternative?  Influence!  By engaging people in the decision-making process, you get greater buy-in, quicker implementation and better results.  Indeed, a former chairman of Porsche, said that his mantra was “Decide democratically, delegate dictatorially.”  He went on to say that “a poor idea, implemented well, will produce better results than a great idea implemented poorly.”

It’s counter-intuitive, but the foundation for career advancement doesn’t lie in positional power; it lies in your ability to influence the thinking of others.  How do you do that?  Remember that persuasion is a myth.  We can’t persuade anyone of anything, they have to persuade themselves.

The best we can do is:

• Shine the light on new information
• Allow employees to process that information and reach their own conclusions
• Allow them to validate their conclusions with their own experiences

If our conclusion is correct, our employees will reach the same conclusion we have and they’ll be excited about the idea because they know it will work.  If, however, we’ve overlooked something in our analysis, our employees can pull our bacon from the fire by shining the light on new information for us.

Fortunately, as a consultant, I never have positional power.  I have no authority in any client organization.  As a result I’m never tempted to use positional power.  Instead I rely on influence.  The ability to influence others‘ thinking serves me equally well in my personal life as it does in my work.  I would never trade that skill for positional power.  Indeed, like the Chairman of Porsche, I didn’t use that power when I had it.

Do yourself a favor.  Use the steps outlined above to influence others’ thinking instead of exerting positional power.  You’ll quickly discover that leadership can be fun and exciting instead of stressful and draining.  The choice is yours.  Which will you choose?

The 7 Steps to Becoming INVALUABLE program is designed to help you see more effective ways of doing business – ways that dramatically improve your bottom line while making your life easier.  In today’s blog I used Step 5, Contrarian Mindset, to demonstrate the often overlooked disadvantages of positional power, Step 6, Eclectic Education, to provide insights from an incredibly successful former Chairman of Porsche and Step 2, The Persuasion Myth, to help you see how easy it is to gain influence.  For more information on the 7 Steps to Becoming INVALUABLE visit www.furtwengler.com/7steps.htm.

If you’d like to receive a weekly email reminder with a link to The Invaluable Leader blog or if you’d like me to address specific topics, please send me an email at dale@furtwengler.com.  Please share your experience with our readers by posting a comment below.

Good news – My latest book, Pricing for Profit, was released 9.9.09 in the United States, Canada, U.K., Italy, France, Germany and the Netherlands.  It’s available in all the major bookstores – Borders, Barnes and Noble and Amazon.

A world-class competitors’ view…

…of lessons learned.

As you’ve probably noticed, I’ve become a huge fan of Josh Waitzkin’s book, The Art of Learning. In particularly reflective mood he wrote “We have to release our current ideas to soak in new material, but not so much that we lose touch with our natural talents.”

What a beautiful way of describing what we need to do to effectively integrate lessons learned.  It’s so easy, when learning something new, to become enamored with the new concepts and fail to ascertain whether or not that new information fits our style or how it will help us achieve our goals.

Certainly most of what we learn can be adapted to fit our style and support our efforts in achieving our goals.  Unfortunately, we don’t often think about how to adapt the lessons learned until we’ve experienced some disappointment.

It’s counter-intuitive, but you can accelerate the successful integration of new knowledge by asking yourself three questions:

1. Will this information help me achieve my goals?
2. Is this information congruous with my style?
3. If not, how can I adapt it to fit my style?

The answers to these simple questions will help you strike the balance Josh Waitzkin so  eloquently described.

The 7 Steps to Becoming INVALUABLE program is designed to help you see more effective ways of doing business – ways that dramatically improve your bottom line while making your life easier.  In today’s blog I used Step 6, Eclectic Education, to gain new perspectives from World Champion Chessmaster and Tai Chi Chuan master, Josh Waitzkin.  I also used Step 4, See Similarities, to demonstrate how to apply these concepts to any life situation you face.  For more information on the 7 Steps to Becoming INVALUABLE visit www.furtwengler.com/7steps.htm.

If you’d like to receive a weekly email reminder with a link to The Invaluable Leader blog or if you’d like me to address specific topics, please send me an email at dale@furtwengler.com.  Please share your experience with our readers by posting a comment.

Good news – My latest book, Pricing for Profit, was released 9.9.09 in the United States, Canada, U.K., Italy, France, Germany and the Netherlands.  It’s available in all the major bookstores – Borders, Barnes and Noble and Amazon.

Thanks to all of you, Pricing for Profit jumped from #83 in the category of pricing books on Amazon to #41 in a week.  May your kindness be repaid a thousand times.

If you’re struggling to get noticed…

…you may want to try a different language.

I received a call from a woman who had forwarded her resume to me.  She asked “What can I do to make my resume more powerful?”  A few days later, a business owner told me that he was expanding his market and wanted some thoughts on how to craft his message for that market.

My answer to both was exactly the same, “Talk about the results you’ve gotten.”  When I see a resume that doesn’t highlight results, I question whether or not the person has produced any.  When I see marketing materials or a website that talks about what the business does I can’t help but wonder “What did the customer get?”

While both of the examples above relate to business, the universal language of results applies to all aspects of our lives.  If someone offers you child-rearing tips, advice on how to bring romance back into your life or ways improve your health, you’re going to discount that advice unless the person can demonstrate that he or she has gotten results.  And you should, after all it’s the result you’re after.  As the old adage says “if you don’t know where you’re going, any road will do.”  But we’re not interested in any road, we want to reach a specific destination – to get a specific result.

It’s a natural human tendency to want to talk about what we do.  That’s the way we’re wried.  Unfortunately, it’s not what potential employers and prospective customers want to hear.  They want to know, “Can you produce the result?”

It’s counter-intuitive, but if your message isn’t helping you get noticed, your probably speaking the wrong language.  You’re speaking the language of process instead of the language of results.  Whenever you’re asked “What do you do?”, pause a moment and think about the language you’re about to use.  If it’s the language of process, shelve that commentary.  Shift gears and tell that prospective employer or customer what results you can produce for them.  That’s how you stand out from the crowd.  That’s how you get noticed.  That’s how you get hired.

The 7 Steps to Becoming INVALUABLE program is designed to help you see more effective ways of doing business – ways that dramatically improve your bottom line while making your life easier.  In today’s blog I used Step 4, Seeing Similarities, to determine that the employment situation and the shift in market focus were exactly the same situation.  Then I used, Step 1, Contributory Negligence, to determine what these folks were doing that caused them not to gain the interest they desired.  Finally, I used Step 5, Contrarian Mindset, to demonstrate that results is a universal language.  For more information on the 7 Steps to Becoming INVALUABLE visit www.furtwengler.com/7steps.htm.

If you’d like to receive a weekly email reminder with a link to The Invaluable Leader blog or if you’d like me to address specific topics, please send me an email at dale@furtwengler.com.  Please share your experience with our readers by posting a comment.

Good news – My latest book, Pricing for Profit, was released 9.9.09 in the United States, Canada, U.K., Italy, France, Germany and the Netherlands.  It’s available in all the major bookstores – Borders, Barnes and Noble and Amazon.

None of us wants to be average.

Or do we?

One of my favorite authors is Robert Cialdini , a social psychologist who teaches at Arizona State University. His latest book, Yes! 50 Scientifically Proven Ways to Be Persuasive, offers new and fascinating insights into human nature.

He and several other researchers did a study of 300 California households’ energy usage. They communicated the results to the participants. While they expected the results to cause the highest users to cut their energy consumption. They didn’t expect the lowest users to raise their power usage, but they did.

This and other studies he and his colleagues have done demonstrate that there is a natural human tendency to move to what he calls “the magnetic middle” – to become average. Can that be true? Do we really strive to be average? Let’s consider some common behaviors and see whether or not Dr. Cialdini’s observations apply to us.

Do you discount your talents, abilities and experience by assuming that, because they come naturally to you, everyone possesses those abilities? Have you presumed that the “facts” you possess are self-evident – that everyone has those facts?

It’s these presumptions that we’re “normal” and, consequently, the rest of the population is just like us that often gets us into trouble. It’s the reason others get the feeling that we aren’t listening to them, that we don’t care about their perspectives, that we’re arrogant or stubborn for standing so firmly on our beliefs.

How do we overcome this natural tendency? The first step is awareness. We have to understand that we’re not like everyone else – that we possess skills and abilities that others don’t possess and that we may be fighting different demons than they are. This knowledge allows us to see, and command fair compensation, for the value we bring to the table. It also allows us aid others in the fights with their demons and, in doing so, helps us build an army to help us fight our own.

Second, as we enter conversations, we need to remind ourselves that others have different backgrounds and experiences than we do; consequently, they’re going to have perspectives that are dramatically different than ours. Relish this diversity! It affords us wonderful opportunities to grow, personally and professionally.

Third, we need to acknowledge that our goals in life, our dreams, are not the same as theirs. We need to respect the fact that others want different things in life than we do. This will help us avoid setting unreasonable expectations of others – expectations that are likely to be the source of great frustration for both of us.

It’s counter-intuitive, but if you want to stop discounting your offerings, if you want better relationships with family, friends, coworkers and bosses, you need to stop presuming that everyone is just like you. You have to avoid the magnetic middle.

The 7 Steps to Becoming INVALUABLE program I offer is designed to help you see more effective ways of doing business – ways that dramatically improve your bottom line while making your life easier. In today’s blog I used Step 4, Seeing Similarities, to combine an insight from a social psychologist’s experiment with my observations of the natural tendency my consulting and coaching clients have to devalue their offerings to help you avoid this pitfall. I also employed Step 5, Contrarian Mindset, to help you see the value of varying perspectives have both for your personal and professional growth and in strengthening your relationships with others. For more information on the 7 Steps to Becoming INVALUABLE visit www.furtwengler.com/7steps.htm.

If you’d like to receive a weekly email reminder with a link to The Invaluable Leader blog or if you’d like me to address specific topics, please send me an email at dale@furtwengler.com. Please share your experience with our readers by posting a comment.

Good news – My latest book, Pricing for Profit, was released 9.9.09 in the United States, Canada, U.K., Italy, France, Germany and the Netherlands.  Pick up your copy today!  It’s available in all the major bookstores – Borders, Barnes and Noble and Amazon.

For more information on Dr. Cialdini and his fascinating work, visit http://www.influenceatwork.com/

A dilemma…

…or an opportunity for enlightenment?

A friend was telling me of an opportunity that presented itself.  Someone, who had a lot of very attractive contacts, wanted to do some joint marketing.  My friend then said that his potential partner, at their first meeting, had launched into an hour-long presentation of what he did and how valuable it was.  My friend asked for my thoughts regarding this opportunity.

What would your response have been?  Should he pursue this opportunity?  Is further exploration warranted?  Or should he forego this opportunity?  Regardless of your response, I’d like you to take a moment to reflect on the rationale for whatever advice you would have offered.  What were your reasons for the conclusion you reached?

Here’s how I responded.  I told him that I didn’t feel like there was much promise in this potential partnership.  Why?  Because I saw incongruities in what my friend was being told.  First, his potential partner claimed to have a lot of very attractive contacts.  If he was that well connected and had that many people who valued his offerings, why would he need a partner to market his offerings?

Second, during the first meeting with my friend,  his potential partner did an information dump that indicated that he wasn’t very adept at sales.  All of the effective salespeople I know tantalize prospects and potential partners by offering glimpses of what they’re offering without divulging much about the offering itself.

Finally, the potential partner did little exploration of my friend’s background, skills, abilities, interests or results.  His focus was on convincing my friend that he would be a valuable partner.

What was the result?  My friend came back to me and said that my assessment was right on target.  During his second meeting with this potential partner he asked for examples of the results and successes the partner had achieved.  He asked about the strength of the potential partner’s relationships with his contacts.  Finally, he inquired about the potential partner’s knowledge of his business.What my friend’s inquiries uncovered was that his potential partner’s business was built on a very shaky structure.  Not one on which he wanted to invest a lot of time, energy or money.  He ended this partnership exploration after two meetings.

It’s counter-intuitive, but we can’t discover the truth in what we’re being told until we’ve investigated the incongruities.  In every misrepresentation, whether intentional or not, the truth can be found in the incongruities.  If you’re looking for a way to assess what you’re being told, compare the behaviors the other person is exhibiting against what you’re being told.  Then ask “Are this person’s words and behaviors aligned?”  If they are, you have good reason to move forward.  If not, the incongruities will lead you to the truth.  Once you’ve discovered the truth, you’ll know whether or not to proceed.

The 7 Steps to Becoming INVALUABLE program I offer is designed to help you see more effective ways of doing business – ways that dramatically improve your bottom line while making your life easier.  In today’s blog I used Step 4, See Similarities, to show that the absence of similarities between behavior and words is a cause for further investigation.  I also used Step 5, Contrarian Mindset, to demonstrate that incongruities should be a cause for celebration, not consternation – a source of truth, not a dilemma.  For more information on the 7 Steps to Becoming INVALUABLE visit www.furtwengler.com/7steps.htm.

If you’d like to receive a weekly email reminder with a link to The Invaluable Leader blog or if you’d like me to address specific topics, please send me an email at dale@furtwengler.com.  Please share your experience with our readers by posting a comment.

Good news – My latest book, Pricing for Profit, was released 9.9.09 in the United States, Canada, U.K., Italy, France, Germany and the Netherlands.  It’s available in all the major bookstores – Borders, Barnes and Noble and Amazon.

Is social networking the latest business tool?

Or simply the new backyard?

When I was a kid (yes, I can remember that far back), we didn’t have air-conditioning so the neighbors would sit out during the evening and visit while the day’s heat dissipated.  As air-conditioning became more affordable, those evenings under the stars ended and the close relationships we had with neighbors declined.

Many of us of that generation are using the social networks to reconnect with the people of our youth and experiencing great joy at finding long-lost friends.  Even those too young to remember the backyard visits appreciate the relationship building power of these social networks.  Facebook, Twitter and a whole host of social networks have become the new backyard.

Yet many of us in business keep trying to convert these tools for business purposes.  A few have done so with great success.  Most of us, however, are struggling to make effective use of these tools.  Why?  Because it seems to take inordinate amounts of time to sift through the backyard stuff to get to the business stuff.  That will continue to be our dilemma until greater segmentation occurs within the social networks.

It’s counter-intuitive, but most of us are not going to be successful using social networks until we separate our social contacts from our business contacts and consciously decide how much time and energy to devote to building each type of relationship.  The more conscious the choice, the greater success we’ll enjoy in both arenas.

The 7 Steps to Becoming INVALUABLE program is designed to help you see more effective ways of doing business – ways that dramatically improve your bottom line while making your life easier.  In today’s blog I used Step 4, See Similarities, to relate today’s social networking rage with the mechanism used decades earlier.  Then I used Step 1, Contributory Negligence, to see what we’re doing that contributes to the problems we’re having converting this tool to business purposes.  For more information on the 7 Steps to Becoming INVALUABLE visit www.furtwengler.com/7steps.htm.

If you’d like to receive a weekly email reminder with a link to The Invaluable Leader blog or if you’d like me to address specific topics, please send me an email at dale@furtwengler.com.  Please share your experience with our readers by posting a comment.

Good news – My latest book, Pricing for Profit, is going to be released 9.9.09 in the United States, Canada, U.K., Italy, France, Germany and the Netherlands.  Prepublication orders are being taken at amazon.com, borders.com and barnesandnoble.com. Enjoy!